


Fifty Ways to Say I Love You

by Chocolatequeen



Series: How Does She Know? [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, F/M, Fluff, Romance, eventual pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-11-15 02:47:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11221677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chocolatequeen/pseuds/Chocolatequeen
Summary: Those three little words are not the only way to tell a person you love them... as Rose and the Doctor both know very well.





	1. We can go visit your mum.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is literal. I'm planning 50 short chapters that each show a different way the Doctor and Rose told each other "I love you."

After stepping into the TARDIS, Rose turned and took one last look at Mickey before closing the doors. As soon as the latch clicked shut, the Doctor threw the dematerialisation lever, and the time rotor started its slow movement, taking them not only into the Vortex, but through the Void into the correct universe.

She pressed her back to the door and slid down until she was sitting with her legs pulled up and her head resting on her knees. The polyester maid uniform scratched her arms when she wrapped hem around her legs, but she didn’t care.

When the TARDIS finally stopped her shuddering flight, Rose took a deep breath and looked up at the Doctor. “Well. We made it home,” she said, forcing a cheery tone she didn’t feel.

The Doctor, usually the first to pretend he was all right when wasn’t, didn’t return her fake smile or do a dance around the console as he told her where they were going next. Instead, he walked over to her and held his hand out, then pulled her to her feet.

Rose bit her lip, willing back the tears that threatened again. But when the Doctor wrapped his arms around her and held her close, she couldn’t hold them in any longer. One of his hands moved up to stroke her hair, and he made soothing sounds in her ear as her tears soaked through his dinner jacket.

When her sobs finally slowed, Rose pulled back and wiped at her eyes. “Right. So… where to now?”

The Doctor brushed a few remaining tears away with his thumb and smiled down at her. “I thought you might like to go home, actually. I’ve got the coordinates set, so as soon as you’re ready, we can go visit your mum.”

Rose’s mouth fell open as she stared at him. It was like she was seeing him for the first time. Had he always looked at her with so much tenderness in his eyes?

She’d been waiting for a declaration, or for some sort of conversation where they would talk about their relationship. But from a man who could barely tolerate her mother just a few months ago, his offer to take her home for a visit said the words, loud and clear.

Rose smiled. “Yeah. Let’s take a moment to change into normal clothes, and then I’m ready.”

Despite her sadness, a new feeling of anticipation built in Rose as she walked down the corridor to her room. She had a feeling that things were about to change.


	2. This is my home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set the same day as chapter one, but much later that night.

The Doctor was under the console when he heard the TARDIS door creak open. “Rose?” he called out uncertainly as he pulled himself up onto the grating.

“Well, it’s not my mum,” she said dryly.

He rolled his eyes as he wiped his greasy hands off on a rag. “I did know it was you,” he told her. “I just figured you’d be asleep in your own bed, happy to be home.”

To his surprise, Rose combed through her hair and started wrapping a curl around one finger. That was one of the universal signs for, “Rose Tyler is embarrassed/upset/doesn’t know what to say,” and he was baffled as to what incited it this time.

“Rose?”

She sighed and let go of the strand of hair. “Nothing,” she said. “It’s just… this is my home.”

The Doctor stared at her, his great big Time Lord brain suddenly incapable of understanding four short English words.

“What?”

Rose bit her lip and looked down at the grating. “Mum wanted me to stay, but I just… I couldn’t. I don’t belong in the flat anymore.” She took a breath and looked up at him. “I belong here, on the TARDIS, with you. If that’s all right?”

If it was _all right??_ The one thing he wanted more than anything was to have Rose with him forever, and she wanted to know if it was all right that his home had become her home, too?

“Yeah.” His voice was raspy, and he cleared his throat quickly. “Sorry, been down there breathing in all the dust and debris from our little sojourn across the Void.” He grinned at Rose. “But, as I was saying, it’s absolutely all right that the TARDIS is your home.”

Rose shook her head, and the fond smile teasing the corners of her mouth made the Doctor’s hearts flip. “You’re a bit daft sometimes, you know that?” She reached out, and he took her hand automatically. “Come on. I want to watch something besides EastEnders.”


	3. Is This Okay/Go Back to Sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm combining two prompts here, which means this is ways 3 and 4 to say I love you.

When Rose suggested they watch telly even though she was obviously done in, the Doctor knew she wasn’t quite as all right as she was pretending to be. It was one of the little quirks of Rose Tyler that he’d learned very early in their travels together—if she was upset, she couldn’t fall asleep on her own.

“It’s like… when I’m with you, I can sorta… not think about it,” she’d explained to him, the morning after their ill-conceived trip to 1987. “But alone in my room with the lights off, there’s not distractions. It’s not even nightmares—I just can’t fall asleep.”

Very familiar with this struggle, the Doctor had simply pulled her into a hug.

_Beauty and the Beast_ was cued up when they reached the media room. As soon as they sat down, Rose scooted up next to him and rested her head on his shoulder.

He remembered the first time she’d done that, after they’d left Adam behind. He’d watched her that night, as she’d shifted closer to him, inch by inch, until finally, halfway through the movie, she’d taken his hand and cuddled against his side.

“This all right?” she’d asked, her voice barely a whisper.

The Doctor had nodded, then swallowed hard and said, “Yeah, ‘course it is,” somehow managing to sound completely nonchalant.

Tonight, with his suit jacket discarded hours ago, he could feel her human heat through the thin layer of his Oxford. Several of the barriers he kept between them crumpled at the sensation, and as the prologue played, he carefully moved his arm until it was wrapped around her shoulders. He held his breath, but after a brief moment of surprise, Rose relaxed completely into his embrace.

With Rose in his arms, the Doctor hardly noticed the movie. This—actually cuddling on the sofa, reciprocating her touch—was a move he didn’t think he could step back from. Not without hurting Rose, at least. Maybe some friends could cuddle together and not have any romantic undertones to the gesture, but for friends who knew they had mutual feelings, this could only be a signal that he was ready for more.

But was he? The Doctor considered his reasons for holding them back, especially his fear of losing Rose. She would die one day, long before he did, and the thought of going on without her made his stomach tighten painfully.

But she’d die whether they were together or not. He’d tried to tell himself that keeping their relationship platonic would somehow keep her safe… but he knew that wasn’t the truth.

In the middle of his pondering, he realised that Rose had fallen asleep. He looked down at her blonde head, pillowed on his shoulder, and his chest constricted.

Could he let go of his fears, if moments like this were the trade-off? Or perhaps, he dared to think, for even greater intimacy?

Yes. He could.

Rose snored softly, and the Doctor pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. Then, moving carefully, he stood and picked her up.

Her eyes fluttered open. “Doctor?” she asked groggily.

“Shhh, go back to sleep, Rose.” He pushed the door open and carried her down the corridor. “I’m just going to get you into bed.”

A ghost of a smile crossed her face. “Always wanted to hear you say that,” she mumbled. Then she relaxed back into his arms, apparently unaware of the way his hearts were now racing.

_Maybe soon, Rose,_ he thought as he laid her down on her bed.

He pulled the covers up to her chin, then quietly left the room and went back to the console room. The TARDIS still needed some repairs, and he could think better if he had something to do with his hands.

He would lose her one day, but they could be happy together today. He just needed to figure out the perfect way to let Rose know that he was ready.


	4. 5: I love making you smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is exactly 500 words.

After a week in London helping her mum clean out Mickey’s flat, Rose was itching to get back to the stars. As soon as the flat door closed behind them, she and the Doctor reached for each other’s hands, and with a manic grin, they ran down the stairs and across the courtyard to the TARDIS.

The ship hummed happily when they crossed the threshold, and Rose brushed her fingers over a strut in greeting. “So, Doctor… where to next?” she asked, shooting him a teasing smile.

Anticipation made her belly flip when she noticed the way his gaze fixed on the tip of her tongue, poking out of her mouth. After a moment, he cleared his throat and shifted his gaze so he was looking into her eyes, instead. Rose bit the corner of her mouth to hide a smirk when saw the back of his neck and the tips of his ears turn red.

“That, Rose Tyler, is a surprise!” the Doctor announced gleefully as he skipped over to the console. He flipped the dematerialisation lever, and Rose grabbed onto the railing as the ship lurched into flight. “I spent all day yesterday getting it ready.”

Rose looked around the console room as they flew through time and space. There was one medium sized bag sitting beside the doors—but she knew well enough to know that its apparent size had no bearing on how much it held.

She laughed when they hit a pocket of turbulence that nearly sent her crashing to the grating, then beamed at the Doctor and ran for the door as soon as they landed. The first step onto a new planet was one of her favourite moments.

Fresh mountain air, carrying notes of pine and wildflowers, wafted over Rose as she stepped out of the ship. She gasped when she saw the crystal clear lake reflecting the craggy peaks of the mountains surrounding it. Birdsong melded together with the wind in the trees and the gentle lapping of water at the shore to create a peaceful symphony.

“Doctor, it’s gorgeous.” Rose jogged into the sunny spot in the middle of the clearing. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back, then held her arms out and spun in circles.

The Doctor chuckled, and gauging his position by the sound, she stopped spinning and looked up at him. “I love the way you smile when I take you someplace new,” he told her.

His uncharacteristic candour flustered Rose, and she tried to hide it by tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “Well, I love travelling with you,” she said, repeating what she’d told him on New Earth. “But you still haven’t told me where we are.”

He crossed the clearing and took her hand. “This is Burren. I thought we’d camp here for a few days.” The Doctor tugged her towards a path that led along the lake. “But first, Rose Tyler, are you ready to do a little exploring?”


	5. Can I Kiss You?

Their first day on Burren went exactly as the Doctor had planned. Rose loved the hike through the woods, and when they came out in a meadow of wildflowers, she’d lain back with him in the sweet-smelling clover and joined in him a game of finding shapes in the clouds moving overhead.

They’d watched the sun set over the lake and the moon rise over the mountains. And now, with their campfire dying, he pulled out his last surprise.

“So, where are we going to sleep?” Rose asked as he unzipped the bag he’d packed earlier.

The Doctor winked at her. “Just you wait, Rose Tyler.”

Exposed to the air, the forty-second century air mattress slowly expanded while the Doctor shook out the bedding. He heard Rose’s sharp inhale when she realised his plan, and he glanced up at her.

“This all right?” he asked, holding a blanket in front of him and feeling strangely vulnerable. “It’s a gorgeous night. I thought we could watch the stars.”

Rose nodded slowly, and he could see her gathering her courage. Her shoulders straightened, and she met his gaze steadily. “It’s a bit romantic, sleeping out under the stars.”

The Doctor swallowed. She’d thrown down the gauntlet, and he could either pick it up, or run from it. But strangely, the urge to run seemed to have disappeared.

“Is that all right?”

Joy sparked in Rose’s eyes, and between that and the way the firelight cast a golden halo around her, the Doctor was sharply reminded of when she’d stepped out of the TARDIS as the Bad Wolf.

He shook the image away and smiled at her. “Come on. There’s supposed to be a meteor shower tonight.”

Rose shook her head and wrinkled her nose. “We’re not sleeping in our clothes,” she said decisively. “Come on, Doctor. Last one back outside in their pyjamas has to make breakfast in the morning.”

The Doctor snorted. “Well, there’s no motivation for me win that contest,” he said. “I like my breakfast to be edible, thanks.”

Rose laughed, then spun around and ran into the TARDIS. After spreading the last blanket out over the mattress, the Doctor followed her.

When he stepped back outside fifteen minutes later, Rose was already lounging in the bed. One side of the blankets was flipped up in invitation, and the domestic picture made his hearts skip a beat.

He slid in beside her without a second’s hesitation. “Hi,” he whispered.

Rose rolled onto her side and reached for his hand. “Hi there. Guess you’re making breakfast.”

The Doctor chuckled. “You can give me your order in the morning,” he promised. A strand of hair fell into her face, and he let go of her hand to comb it back over her ear.

Rose shifted closer to him and put her hand on his chest. “Your hearts are racing.”

The Doctor let his fingers linger on her throat, feeling her pulse. “So’s yours.”

“Doctor…”

He pressed his finger to her lips and leaned towards her. “Rose. May I kiss you?”

He was close enough to feel her exhale. “Please.”

The Doctor slid his hand to the back of her neck and cradled her head at the base of her skull. Touching Rose this intimately was like feeling the fire of regeneration burn through him, only instead of pain, every nerve ending was alight with pleasure. Her hand crept up into his hair, and he focused on the way her touch singed him and set him on fire.

“Doctor.”

Her pleading whisper reminded him that he’d almost forgotten his purpose. He brushed his nose against hers, then finally let their lips meet.

Immediately, the soft, closed-mouth kiss was not enough. He ran his hand down her back and pulled her closer, then tilted his head and took her bottom lip between his own, worrying it gently with soft nips.

Rose’s nails scraped against his scalp, and the Doctor gasped as the steady warmth he’d felt fanned into a blaze. She scraped her teeth over his bottom lip, and he whimpered in pleasure.

He felt her lips curve up in a smile, then she pulled back and rubbed her thumb over his lip. “Well, I don’t know about you,” she teased, “but I saw plenty of stars just then.”

The Doctor laughed and pressed another quick kiss to Rose’s lips, then rolled over on his back. He hummed happily a moment later when she cuddled against his side with her head resting on his shoulder.

A meteor fell across the sky above them, and the Doctor tapped Rose on the shoulder. “Make a wish.”

She shook her head and kissed him on the cheek. “I already have everything I’ve wished for."


	6. #7: Well, what do you want to do?

A camping trip had never been on Rose’s list of romantic dates. However, spending time completely alone with the Doctor and sleeping in his arms under the stars couldn’t be anything but. Rose relished the feeling of having his undivided attention as they cautiously explored the new facet of their relationship.

But during breakfast on their third morning on Burren, she saw his gaze dart to the TARDIS several times. He was also more fidgety than usual as he straightened up their campsite, moving things from place to place.

_He’s restless,_ she realised. _Ready to go back out to the stars._

She sighed and looked across the lake at the mountains. It was beautiful here, and she was a little afraid that once they left, the quiet intimacy that had developed between them would disappear.

Then he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, and the way he nuzzled into her neck calmed her concerns.

“What do you want to do today?” he murmured after kissing her shoulder.

Rose turned and linked her arms loosely behind his neck. “I was going to ask you the same thing,” she said as she played with the hairs at the nape of his neck. “Are you ready to leave?”

The Doctor’s eyes lit up, but still, he pursed his lips and shook his head. “I thought you’d want to stay here a bit longer,” he protested.

Rose smiled at him. “I wouldn’t mind,” she admitted. “But I want you to be happy, too—and I always love travelling with you.” She tilted her head and let her tongue peek out from behind her teeth. “Come on, Doctor,” she teased. “There’s gotta be someplace you’ve been wanting to take me.”

The Doctor stared down at Rose for a long moment, his hearts speeding up when he saw the love in her eyes. _How did I get lucky enough to meet someone who knows me so well, and who loves travelling just as much as I do?_

He leaned down and kissed her, enjoying the feeling of her lips against his while part of his mind considered various possible destinations. The universe was full of places he wanted to take Rose Tyler, but he wanted this trip to be something he knew she’d really enjoy.

The answer came to him finally, and he pulled out of the kiss with a triumphant grin on his face. “I still owe you a concert,” he said, alluding to the time they’d missed seeing Ian Dury. “And I know you like to dress up in period clothes, so… Rose Tyler, how would you like to see Elvis?”


	7. 8: Here, let me fix it, and 9: I think you're beautiful

Pink skirts swished around Rose’s legs as she walked back to her room. The TARDIS had delivered, as always, and she couldn’t wait to see the look on the Doctor’s face when he saw her fishnet stockings and peep-toe heels.

She was in the middle of imagining the way he might spin her out, then bend her back over his arm for a kiss when she realised the TARDIS had switched corridors on her. Instead of being almost to her room, she was only a few feet away from the Doctor’s.

_What are you up to?_ she wondered, patting the roundel in the wall. The lights flashed in answer, and Rose shrugged, then knocked on the Doctor’s door.

“Coming!” he called out.

Rose frowned at the strained note in his voice, then knocked again.

“Give me just… five… no maybe ten minutes, Rose!”

She stared at the door and bit her lip. When the lights flashed again, she took a deep breath and pushed it open. “Doctor?” she said hesitantly. “Did you need some help with something?”

There was a moment of silence, then he sighed loudly. “You can’t laugh.”

Rose raised an eyebrow and started in the direction of his voice. “I promise.”

She heard shuffling on the other side of a closed door. When the door swung open, her eyes widened and she had to bite her lip to keep her promise.

The Doctor’s hair, normally styled to perfection, was a disaster. Random bits were sticking straight up while other parts lay flat against his head.

His lower lip jutted out in a pout. “I wanted a Teddy boy quiff,” he explained, “but I can’t get it to stay up right.”

Rose licked her lips. “D’you want me to fix it for you?” she offered, trying not to sound too eager. She loved running her fingers through the Doctor’s gorgeous hair.

His eyes lit up. “Would you?”

She nodded. “Go out there and sit down while I look for the right styling product. Looks like you weren’t using anything with a strong enough hold for a quiff,” she said, glancing at the bottles and jars littering the vanity.

“Brilliant! Thank you!” The Doctor went back into his room and shook his head when he found a tall stool waiting for him in the middle of the room. _You’re meddling again, but I forgive you this time._

He perched on the stool, facing the door, and Rose appeared a moment later with a single tub in hand. “Here, you hold it,” she said, crossing the room and handing it to him.

The Doctor dutifully took the jar and waited for his next instruction. After a brief pause, he felt Rose’s fingers sink into his hair, massaging his scalp and then tugging the strands up hair upright.

_Oh… blimey_. He loved it when Rose touched his hair while they were kissing, but somehow, he hadn’t considered how… pleasant it would be for her to style his hair for him.

She moved around to stand in front of him, and he focused on the sound her skirt made. “Nice dress,” he said, touching the pink satin. “Very chic, very mod.”

Rose swayed slightly so the dress would float around her. “Thanks. I like it. Still have to do my own hair, but other than that, I think I’ll do.”

The Doctor shook his head at the slightly self-deprecating attitude. “You’re beautiful,” he corrected, then watched in fascination as a blush spread across Rose’s cheeks. “You’ll be the prettiest woman there, by far.”

Rose shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Well, let’s get you taken care of first.” She dipped her fingers into the open jar he held, and he watched with rapt fascination as she worked the product between her hands, warming it and making it malleable. His eyes fluttered shut as her hands moved back into his hair, working the product in from root to tip.

The Doctor took a shuddering breath, trying to control his reaction to Rose’s touch. But just when he thought he had himself under control again, her fingers brushed against his temples.

He pressed his lips together, but a soft moan still escaped him. Rose paused and looked down at him, and he shuddered when he could feel her curiosity and interest.

“You like that?” she asked. Her hands moved again, leaving his temples behind, but still touching his hair.

“Love your hands in my hair,” he admitted, unsurprised by how raspy his voice had gotten. “And the temple is a sensitive spot for me.”

Rose hummed, and her hands kept moving, tugging lightly as she got his hair to stand up the way he wanted it to. “Hmmm… I’ll have to remember that for later,” she teased.

The Doctor had to swallow twice before he could say anything in response to that, and by the time lips and tongue could move independently again, Rose had pulled her hands away from his head.

“Well, there you go. Perfect, even if I do say so myself.”

The Doctor reached out and put his hands on her hips, then looked up at her. “I’m sure it is,” he agreed. “And how does my hairdresser want to be paid?”

The tip of Rose’s tongue peeked out between her teeth as she stepped in between his legs and rested her hands on his shoulders. “Oh, I’m sure you’ll think of something,” she drawled. “You’re very clever.”

He chuckled, then reached up and pushed a strand of hair back over her ear. “I am very clever.” He left his hand on the back of her neck and encouraged her to bend down so he could catch her lips in a kiss. “Very clever, and very generous.”


End file.
